Blue whale that's eating our dreams away .....

     Every few days I read about some child falling prey to a game called blue whale , it's so sad some idiot out there decides about how weak or strong our kids are . I kept wondering why children fall prey to such people ? Who is that man out there to judge anyones kids ? What does he know about having babies . If we honestly think about it have we ever told our kids what we went through to have them? So many times when we argue with our kids we hear our kids say I didn't force you to have me ,you chose to have me . And that is the end of the argument . Today I feel  I should continue this argument let every child know out there what me and every mother out there felt when we were having you . 

   Well  firstly it's true no child has ever forced us to have them it was a choice we make on our own ,a choice that changes our lives daily. Believe me when I say it changes our lives daily, I truly mean it . Let's start how -The 1 st time when we come to know we are carrying a baby inside us we are scared really scared, imagine a doctor tells us there is a living being growing inside, fear creeps in but it doesn't take away the pure joy life is going to bring. believe me the 1st thought that came to my mind when I was told this was 'oh shit I have something living inside me ". And that day from a young free girl I became a mother instantly ,I am sure every mother out there agrees with me . From that day we moms are never alone . Every day we speak to the baby not knowing if the baby inside you even understands what youre ranting away , every fear ,every happiness , every confusion , every anger you share with this little thing growing inside you. Your youthful body changes we start looking like someone we don't even know ,but we love these changes and show off these changes so proudly ,though deep down we know we will never look what we looked before but we happily give up all that for just that baby that is growing inside us . We eat food we may have never liked ,had medicines that made us vomit, anything and everything what people would say would be good for the baby we would do ,not once we thinks about ourselves , actually she has totally forgotten about her existance . She is just a mother ,those nine months when the baby is growing inside her ,her life is only about the baby . Ever step she takes or doesn't take is keeping her little one in mind . Everyday she speaks to her child ,not about what the childs future holds , the only thing that she keeps wondering is will She be a good mom to the baby ?  Will she be able to take care of the baby on her own ? Will she be able to protect the baby from the outside world , exacly how she takes care of it now in her womb ? As a child she has played with dolls must have acted like a mom to the dolls would it be exactly similar,now very soon she will have her own real doll who will be with her for rest of her life she has so many confusions going on in her head .  I still remember I had so many insecurities so many fears going on inside my mind I always worried if any action or thought would harms my baby , I remember how I would torture my doctor asking him silly questions and he very calmly telling me " don't worry Sushma you will do good " . Believe me when I say in those nine month not once a mom thinks about the babies looks ,babies intelligence or any thing what the world will be expecting out of the baby  . Her only prayer every single day to almighty is to give her baby good health and happiness. 

      After 9 months the baby is born and the pain she feels when she delivers her bundle of joy is something that is unexplainable , let's say ,it's like every bone in your body is breaking at the same time  but even in that pain the mother is only thinking about the baby hoping she is not harming baby in anyways. Not once she is worried about herself , her thoughts are just with the baby ,and guess what , our moms , who are waiting outside the room hearing her babies screams and cry with pain ,has just one thought going through her mind , She hopes her baby is fine ,hope God gives her baby all the strength she needs ,to be strong through the pain she is going through . moms will always be moms however old their babies grow . The baby comes to this world with her/his own dream . And soon the babies dreams become the parents dreams. Sleepless nights ,dirty laundries ,house always a mess , but all that doesn't really matter coz one smile from the babies make us forget everything ,as parents our lives  changes again . I know I have been only talking about mothers but maybe it's easier for me relate to her more being a mother myself ,but I know my husband the father of my children also made many sacrifices , and continues to still do so .he started working harder not just to give the best ,but to give his bundle of joy everything the child will want ,he gives up his dreams just for the dreams of the babies . He gives up his youth ,his middle age and every age for the happiness of the child . He starts worrying more about his health and tries to be  fit more and be healthier and stronger ,so he can provide well for his loved ones .His whole life is dedicated to the child and their well being .

           Honestly speaking the child has never asked us parents to do any of these things , we are totally aware of it ,but we did it for our babies we did all these things for our bundle of joy ,for they have made us change our lives ,they made us parents made us understand what it is to be a parent and enjoy every second of parenthood . So then children , Tell me , Who are these people who make such games take our bundle of joy away from us ,who are they to decide if our child is weak or strong ,who are they to take the life of the child away ,who are they to mess with our childrens minds. How can they make a game out of a child's life ,how can they judge us as parents .what do they know what a parent and child has gone through . How can they destroy a family ???? 

             To every child out there I know you didn't force us to give birth to you ,but you have forced us to become parents become people we are today . You are the reason why your dreams are our dreams today . Your pain is our pain ,your happiness is our happiness . Your weakness is our weakness and both parents and children can solve everything when they believe In Each other and trust each other . You are the best thing that happened to your parents and don't let anyone else say otherwise . Don't let any Tom dick or Harry judge you . You are who you are and your parents love everything about you . Pls don't let a stupid game take their love away ........don't let the blue whale swallow your happiness ..... Your life is worth much much more ......

70 years of independence

          Hum hoge kaamyab is the song we always sing , and even after 70 years we are still  singing hum hoge kaamyab . How long are we going to take to be truely successful . When our freedom fighters fought for our independence they had so many dreams for this beautiful country of ours . They gave up their lives for a better future for their future generation . They dreamt the future generation will make our country the most developed country in the world, they dreamt of a world where every person man or woman will be equal . They believed in sampurn swaraj total independence and total democracy .

             After 70 years lets think and see are we where our freedom fighters dreamt we would be . Honestly speaking yes we are one of the developing country ,we are doing well in the financial world ,we are doing good in sports , we are developing in many fields , but as human being have we really developed ,have we progressed in our thinking . Our freedom fighters wanted us to all be equal when they fought for our freedom , they never differentiated between man and woman ,big or small ,rich or poor ,business man or farmer they just fought for all of us their fight was for ever human being of our country ,but after 70 years also woman are still  fighting for equal rights .poor is still struggling for their basic rights ,every person are still fighting for their  basic rights like clean sanitation ,we need movies to remind us toilets are so important for everybody .70 years after independence we are fighting for  children's right to education . Why we never understand ,if every child in our country is educated , then nothing  can ever stop our country from being the most developed nation .padega India tab hi toh badega India . We need to be told to keep our country clean and green , wonder why after so many years also we have not got that instilled into our system yet ? Simple things like respect each other has to be reminded to us , to follow traffic rules we need a traffic police to watch us so we don't break rules ,we need a policeman to feel secured , we need someone always cleaning the garbage we throw around our country . After 70 years we are told what we are allowed to eat and what we are not . Seriously where is democracy lost . We are told what a women can wear or what she cannot wear . We are told .......... Actually if u think about it even after 70 years of independence we are still told what to do ... And what not to do ... I wonder why ? 

           India had to fight hard for her independence ,we lost many lives for our independence . On this 70 th year  of independence let's all make a promise to ourselves that we are  not just going say hum hoge kaamyab , but actually become kaamyab not just financially developed country  but also in our thinking . Let's progress in becoming better human beings . This time when we sing the national anthem let's truely feel every word in our heart . Let's make sure we won't let anyone take our independence away from us . Let's show the world we truely are a democratic country . Let's remember wht nehruji told 70 years back "At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps India will awake to life and freedom ."......let's all make a promise to truely love our country ..and also very proudly say I love my country and I will make sure my country is proud of me . 

Friends forever and more .....

  My younger daughter finished her last day at school a few days back ,she came home all sad and cranky and me being me kept pestering her abt wht is really bothering her about the last day of school . What she said made me think . Let me share with you 1 st wht she said to me ,this is what my little girl said " mom 12 years plus I have spent in school and in these 12 years I have made few friends and honestly these are the only friends I have ,suddenly all are  going their different ways to start their new journey to make their future. I too will be starting my new journey ,what if I have forgotten how to make friends ? What if I don't find the right friends ? " . There were so many questions running in her mind , and as her mother I had to help her understand this , so this is what I told her " vanshika in every stage of life we meet different people some become our friends some just remain aquaintaince . Some are there for short time some for long but each one is special in our lives . " Then she told me "but mom you have seema maasee Sameera aunty who have been ur friends for so many years how come they still in your life ". I told her not to worry she will find new friends and meeting new friends doesn't mean we lose our old  friends  ,the ones who are close to ur heart will always be in your life . After having a chat with her she felt better and relaxed . 

          But after this talk with my daughter I started thinking about all my friends who I  met in different stages of my life and each one played such a beautiful role in my life ,they are few friends but they are the best . My school friends who were so wonderful with me in school and some of them I still am in touch with . And in my teens I meet Sameera shaheen and seema all 3 were the bestest friends I can ever ask . Seema who I share everything ,after so many years she is become such  a important part of my life . I grew up with her she was with me for more than half my life always standing by me . We know each other so well. She has always been my best friend . 

        Then as I grew older I meet few more friends deepa ,Rama ,ameeta , who I grew older with . But today I want to talk about my 5 friends I met coz of a passion we all had ,which was running . Sometimes I feel running must have just been a reason for us to meet ,somewhere we were destined to meet . Let me tell you about my 5 friends . 

          Let's start with Jenny . She is the most sweetest and should I say the quietest among all of us  . She is always praying for all of us , infact we all believe her prayers work . And we enjoy troubling her ,she cooks amazing food for us . She quietly listens to all our talks and maybe once in a while make small funny comments too , she is always smiling . 

       Then comes Geeta , I love this woman , she truely is a motivational person , so full of life , Geeta is an all rounder . Full of energy  and always on the go ,how good she is at handling her office that efficient she is at taking care of her house and an amazing mom to her kids ,they share such a beautiful rapport . Geeta can make anyone talk and laugh . She is truely an amazing person. 

      Then comes my favourite Nitin  . The god father of our group . He is a hard core Al Pacino fan , and we call him our very own  desi al Pacino . Any outsider who met him will think he is reserved and a very quiet person ,but people don't go by his looks he is one brat ,full of mischief . But a sweet person and my favourite . 

     Then Sushma ,we both have the same name ,but Sushma I rarely call her my friend I always treat her like my little sister ,I am very protective about her . We have a different chemistry . So no words ,we both know what she means to me .

     Then comes  the baby of our group dhiraj , youngest and handsome and full of energy always laughing always jumping around , his energy brings so much energy to our group .he is the fresh breath of air innocent and loving and I love fighting with him the most . He loves going for trek quite an adventurous person . 

     And then it's me , well according to me I am perfect. But I am sure my friends will say otherwise ,so let's not talk abt me . 

      Each one of us are so different each have different views ,different life style, different thought process , but when we are together we have this amazing bond a chemistry that I don't know if any words can describe . But let me try the impossible . Well when we are together we are like  these crazy people ,who don't care about the world around us . We are sometimes like teenagers giggling at silly things , we can giggle and laugh at anything and everything . Then sometimes we are like adults who can discuss serious things without hesitation , each one have their own views and each one makes sure they are heard loud and clear , some times we can be such jokers that people around us have a good laugh and we love to see people around us happy . There are times when we argue or fight and next minute we are like inseparable and nothing can separate us . When we are together we forget the world around us everything around us looks so perfect . Life looks so perfect . We love every minute that we spend together ,for that is the time when we are like kids , always laughing ,always playing some pranks , always challenging each other , always dancing without caring what the world thinks about us . Always standing up for each other and protecting each other . Always listening to each other's problems and helping to solve it or sometimes by just listening we helping each other . It's a lively relationship and a lovely relationship , for in this relationship we are not judgemental nor we have any expectations from each other , we accept each other exactly the way we are ,with our perfection or imperfection ,without expecting to bring  any change in each other ,for we choose each other exactly the way we are . And honestly you cannot change perfection . I feel lucky that I have the privilege to be a part of this crazy ,amazingly blissfull friends circle . Touchwood.....

        I hope my little girl too finds her Jenny ,Geeta , Nitin  Sushma and Dhiraj , like I found mine ..........